Are cheating and pornography the answer to the boredom in your bedroom?
The media may try to sell you on the idea that long term committed marriages are a thing of the past, but I’m here to tell you the complete opposite.
People may want you to believe that sex after marriage is dead & borning especially after raising kids and that cheating, swinging, and pornography is where all the excitement is at. Again, that is the farthest thing from the truth.
For those of you who may be struggling in their marriage and about to give up hope, let me reassure you that there are still people who believe in the sanctity of marriage.
There really is such a thing as a healthy, thriving marriage where two people are committed to God, continually discovering who they are as individuals and how to love themselves so that they can love each other that much better.
This is not to shame anyone who has been through a divorce either. Just because someone may have gone through a divorce doesn’t mean they didn’t believe in marriage or that they can’t have a healthy marriage again, if that is what is best for them. Let’s face it some people may never want to marry again and I don’t blame them but this still doesn’t mean that marriage as a whole is a joke because it’s not.
Unfortunately, crap happens. A relationship takes two people. Just because you didn’t have positive role models doesn’t mean you still can’t have a healthy marriage.
News Flash, you still can be married to someone for a really long time, raise a family together, go through some struggles and difficult seasons and still be killing it in the bedroom. FOR REAL.
But having a healthy marriage won’t be easy. It takes work. It means taking responsibility for yourself. Yes, it takes communication too but you need to have empathy for one another because if you don’t, you are only communicating to win not to love, learn and surrender. It takes loads of forgiveness. It takes supporting each other by helping one another heal and grow. It takes letting go of control. You do not control your spouse and your spouse does not control you. It takes giving up the idea that there is such a thing as a perfect marriage. And most importantly, for me and my husband, it takes God because you just can’t do it alone.
The world will try to seduce you making you believe that marriage is just not worth the work or that you are missing out on life or that sex is worthless after marriage or that a healthy marriage means never getting mad or disagreeing with one another. Social media is the best at making people believe that everyone else has this perfect relationship except you.
Anyone, who has it going on in their marriage, will be honest and tell you that is far from the truth. so, let me say it again, there is no such thing as a perfect marriage.
Unless you are dealing with any form of abuse in your relationship, your marriage is worth digging in the trenches for.
Remember, you will always find what you are looking for. If a healthy marriage is really what you want, then you will find the people, tools, and resources to help you.
I’m talking from experience. My husband and I were so jacked up the first part of our marriage. We have lots of good memories early in our relationship but we also had to heal through lots of pain, brokenness and bad choices we are not proud of and if we continued down that road, we would not be who we are today and most likely divorced or flat out miserable, but look at God.
God can heal your marriage and do even greater things within you, but you have to be willing to do the hard stuff.
Marriage is so hard but when you come out of the dark together, you love each other that much more.
Listen to God and don’t buy the fake crap the world is trying to sell you.
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